Being A Friend In A Time Of Crisis

By:  Katie Foley

If you’ve noticed that someone you love has been abused or is currently facing abuse from their partner, don’t be alarmed if they come to you and ask for help. While it may be extremely overwhelming to figure out what to do, we’ve created a list of things to keep in mind if this happens.
 
Be Smart – Show your support by listening and respecting the survivor’s needs. Be smart and remember that this is a dangerous time and your friend may be feeling scared and alone. Assist them by connecting them to community resources or a local victim advocate.
 
Talk More – The only person that can truly tell you what’s going on and how they feel is THAT person. Helping a survivor is crucial for their recovery, but you need to have effective communication to best understand their needs emotionally, physically, and mentally. Sometimes asking, “What can I do?” is more than enough.
 
Safety First - Having a safety plan is crucial in situations involving domestic violence. After talking with a loved one or friend affected by abuse, take the next step by creating a safety plan with the help of a victim advocate. Safety planning includes tips and strategies to keep the victim and those they love safe while preparing for the worst-case scenario.
 
Take Care – Remember, through helping others, that you need boundaries too. Helping a friend affected by domestic violence can be emotionally and mentally draining. While you want to help, you will also be taking on a lot of heartbreak, as you hear what has been happening behind scenes. Make sure you’re practicing self-care by resting, eating, and staying alert – as you need to be in the best shape for yourself and loved one.
 
If you know of someone experiencing domestic violence and you want to help but don’t know how or if you’ve already helped, but want to give him or her more resources – call our crisis hotline Monday through Friday 8:30am - 4:30 pm at (317) 731-6140.