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By: Olivia Hernandez June is Men’s Health Month, a time to prioritize not just physical wellness, but also the mental and emotional health of men and boys across the country. While much of the conversation around domestic and sexual violence focuses on women, and rightfully so, there is a crucial part of the conversation that goes unheard: men who are survivors of domestic violence and sexual assault. The Silent Struggle Statistics show that 1 in 4 men have experienced some form of physical violence by an intimate partner in their lifetime. Additionally, about 1 in 6 men have been sexually abused or assaulted. These numbers are staggering, but they don’t tell the full story. Many men don’t report their experiences due to fear, stigma, or being dismissed. In a society that often ties masculinity to toughness, silence, and stoicism, men are often taught that showing emotion or vulnerability is weakness. This toxic belief system can prevent male survivors from getting the support and healing they need. Barriers to Reporting and Healing Men face unique challenges when it comes to disclosing abuse or assault:
These barriers can lead to long-term mental health struggles, including PTSD, depression, substance use, anxiety, and even suicidal thoughts. It’s Time to Talk About It Raising awareness is key to breaking the cycle of silence. Advocacy organizations, crisis centers, and community leaders must work together to:
Resources for Male Survivors If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic violence or has survived sexual assault, you are not alone. Help is available.
Final Thoughts This Men’s Health Month, let’s expand the conversation to include all survivors, regardless of one’s sex. Supporting male survivors of domestic and sexual violence doesn’t take away from women’s advocacy; it strengthens the fight against abuse for everyone. Healing begins with being heard. Let’s create a culture where every voice, male or female, is believed, supported, and empowered. Sources: Smith, S. G., Zhang, X., Basile, K. C., Merrick, M. T., Wang, J., Kresnow, M., & Chen, J. (2018). The National Intimate Partner and Sexual Violence Survey (NISVS): 2015 data brief – Updated release. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. https://www.cdc.gov/nisvs/about/index.html By: Ashlyn Robertson Every May, National Women's Health Week reminds us to prioritize the well-being of women and girls nationwide. It's a time to take a closer look at how daily habits, preventive care, and emotional balance impact long-term health. Let's illuminate an often-underestimated factor: stress, and how it uniquely affects women’s health. Why Stress Deserves the Spotlight Stress is more than just feeling overwhelmed. It’s a biological response designed to help us manage threats. But when stress becomes chronic, lingering for weeks, months, or even years, it can quietly erode physical and mental health. For survivors of domestic violence and sexual assault, these are the conditions that they meet as they experience violence and the stress that follows traumatic experiences. With sexual assault experiences, stress can look like worrying about your physical safety and how you can afford medical bills following the attack. For domestic violence survivors, they might stress about how to escape, what will keep their abuser happy, and how they could survive without their abuser's support. So, in addition to the immediate effects of the abuse, these women then must grapple with ongoing stress that has long-term impacts. The Physical Costs of Stress in Women Research shows that chronic stress can affect nearly every system in the body, but certain health risks are particularly heightened for women:
The Mental and Emotional Toll Women are twice as likely as men to experience anxiety and depression, and chronic stress is a key contributor. Persistent stress can drain emotional reserves, leading to burnout, sleep disturbances, and decreased quality of life. For survivors, these mental and emotional tolls can result in them making decisions in fight or flight mode. It is hard to make decisions that are beneficial in the long run when you are focused on the next second and fearing for your safety. Steps Toward Stress Resilience The good news? Stress management is a skill that one can strengthen. Here are some impactful ways to protect your health during stressful times:
Celebrate Your Health This Week National Women’s Health Week is more than a calendar event it’s a personal invitation to reflect on your health and take actionable steps to safeguard it. Survivors can struggle with prioritizing their own needs after their trauma, and they may feel as if they don’t deserve it. Everyone deserves a healthy and happy life, and we are here to help survivors find solutions and to advocate for their continued support. Let’s honor this week by committing to stress resilience, self-compassion, and holistic well-being. Your health is worth it. By: Katherine Yajure At Beacon of Hope Crisis Center, our mission is to support and empower individuals impacted by domestic violence and sexual assault. As we walk alongside survivors on their journey toward safety and healing, we often uncover layers of abuse that go beyond physical or emotional harm. One of the most insidious—and often overlooked—forms of abuse is financial abuse. What Is Financial Abuse? Financial abuse occurs when an abuser uses money or access to financial resources as a means to exert power and control over their partner. It can look different in every relationship, but the goal is the same: to trap the survivor in the relationship by making them financially dependent or isolated. Some common tactics of financial abuse include:
Why It Matters Financial abuse occurs in up to 99% of domestic violence cases (NNEDV, 2018). It’s often one of the first signs of abuse and one of the biggest to leaving an unsafe relationship. Without money, a survivor may feel they have no choice but to stay. At Beacon of Hope Crisis Center, we’ve seen firsthand how financial abuse keeps survivors tethered to danger—and how breaking free from it can be a critical first step in reclaiming independence and safety. How We Help Our services are designed to address the full scope of abuse—including financial control. Whether it’s helping a survivor open a safe bank account, connect with employment resources, or understand their legal rights, our team offers support that recognizes the complexity of abuse. We work alongside community partners to:
What You Can Do If you or someone you know is experiencing financial abuse, know that you are not alone. There is help and hope. Recognizing the signs is a powerful first step—and reaching out can change everything. Here are a few ways to support survivors of financial abuse:
Join Our Mission At Beacon of Hope Crisis Center, we believe that freedom from abuse includes financial freedom. Everyone deserves the right to make choices about their own life—including how they earn, spend, and save money. Let’s continue to shine a light on this often-hidden form of control and walk with survivors on their path toward empowerment. Need help or want to talk to someone? Reach out to Beacon of Hope Crisis Center today at our confidential crisis line: 317-731-6140. Our client support specialists are here to support you. By: Aster Rye In the face of unimaginable hardships, survivors need to find ways to stay grounded and cultivate a sense of hope. One effective practice is gratitude, which goes beyond simply saying thank you; it involves being open to receiving kindness and reciprocating it. Gratitude journaling, a technique rooted in positive psychology, can significantly boost both physical and emotional well-being. This practice can be as simple or intricate as one desires. Individuals can jot down a quick list of 3-10 things they are thankful for or take a deeper dive into their feelings, expressing gratitude for specific moments, such as enjoying a sunny day with loved ones. An appealing aspect of gratitude journaling is its flexibility; it doesn't require a daily commitment. Research indicates that even occasional entries—weekly, for instance—are beneficial. By dedicating time to reflect on what truly matters, individuals may find their resilience in the face of adversity strengthened. Ultimately, it encourages a greater awareness of the positive aspects of life. What are you grateful for? Sources: https://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2018/12/24/678232331/if-you-feel-thankful-write-it-down-its-good-for-your-health https://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2015/11/23/456656055/gratitude-is-good-for-the-soul-and-it-helps-the-heart-too https://web.archive.org/web/20110904032507/http://psychology.ucdavis.edu/Labs/emmons/PWT/index.cfm?Section=4 https://www.calm.com/blog/gratitude-journal By: Aster Rye The cycle of abuse keeps a survivor from knowing what to expect. They never know what version of their abuser they are going to get. This allows abusers to maintain power and control over their survivors. As a result of never knowing what to expect, survivors are left experiencing a wide array of emotions. One overpowering feeling that can cause a survivor to freeze or shut down is fear. Living under the weight of abuse and coercive control can result in a relentless knot of fear in the pit of one's stomach. Survivors may live in terror of being followed, saying the wrong thing, or being unable to escape the abuse. As this fear grows, the knot only tightens further, making it increasingly difficult to trust one's feelings and emotions, think clearly, or even breathe normally. An abuser's manipulation and control can cause the survivor to feel on edge, never knowing what is to come. It is important to remember that fear does not define a person; it is a natural survival instinct. While the feeling of fear might seem like a tightening knot that suffocates hope, it is not a permanent condition. Once safe, the fear can often be unraveled with the support of friends, family, or professional client support specialists, who can help lighten the burden. The path to a fear-free future may seem daunting, but with each courageous step forward, that oppressive knot will begin to loosen. And in its place, hope for a peaceful, self-empowered life will have the chance to take root and grow. Survivors can reclaim their lives and strive for a brighter future. By: Abigail Guevara "Resilient, brave, strong, intelligent, and courageous" are just a few of the words that many people use to describe survivors of domestic violence. These descriptions can show up in a variety of ways, as everyone's story is unique, and how people internalize distress from domestic violence is a vastly different process from the way physical distress can present itself, with both immediate and long-term concerns. Amongst other bodily injuries that survivors can have, it is critical to look into cranial brain injuries (also known as traumatic brain injuries (TBIs)) and their overlap with domestic violence. This is why we partner with medical professionals skilled in assessing for brain injury. TBIs can stem from being hit on the head or face by an individual or an object. They can be caused by hitting the head or face against something as a result of being in a crash, being shoved, slammed, violently shaken, or falling, being near an explosion or blast, or strangulation. A history of potential or verified brain injuries from childhood, sports, military, previous domestic violence harm, etc., combined with recent head injuries, can augment the risk of brain tissue degeneration resulting in fatigue, depression and mood changes, memory loss, confusion, aggression, impaired judgment, and difficulty with everyday tasks can lead to dementia and other chronic health conditions. Survivors exposed to intimate partner violence are twice as likely to experience depression and nearly twice as likely to have alcohol use disorders compared to those who have not. Some may mistake cranial brain injuries as a result of a person's physical, social, and mental health issues. Some symptoms would not initially warn or inform survivors of physical violence that there is a cause for concern with their behavior and emotional or cognitive struggles. The effects of intimate partner violence also do not decline with age; therefore, assumptions that past abuse would not be relevant to a client's current neurological state would be careless and incorrect. Interventions to assist with TBI symptoms will vary depending on the symptoms and behaviors exhibited by each person. How a person is initially assessed (primary care, emergency hospitalization, substance abuse care) will also determine the next steps in determining a client's interventions concerning intimate partner violence resulting in a cranial brain injury. It is critical to be proactive in cases where a TBI is highly probable and to get assessed by a medical professional for short and long-term care as soon as possible. As professionals in this field, we are responsible for working on intervention and prevention efforts. We must do all that we can to diminish such violence and prevent TBI cases as a result of domestic violence in the future. As a society, we need to continue to stay educated on the epidemic of TBI cases and take care of ourselves and others around us who could be at risk. We do this so that we can continue to see more survivors in our communities who exhibit the power to come out of domestic violence resilient, brave, strong, intelligent, and courageous. We are grateful for both our medical and law enforcement partners, who have an awareness of this overlapping issue of brain injury and intimate partner violence. Resources Campbell, J. C., Anderson, J. C., McFadgion, A., Gill, J., Zink, E., Patch, M., Callwood, G., & Campbell, D. (2018). The effects of intimate partner violence and probable traumatic brain injury on central nervous system symptoms. Journal of Women’s Health, 27(6), 761–767. https://doi.org/10.1089/jwh.2016.6311 Gilkerson, F. (2022, August 12). Understanding domestic violence as a cause of TBI. Brain Injury Association of America. https://biausa.org/public-affairs/media/domestic-violence-as-a-cause-of-tbi Haag, H. (Lin), Jones, D., Joseph, T., & Colantonio, A. (2019). Battered and brain injured: Traumatic brain injury among women survivors of intimate partner violence—a scoping review. Trauma, Violence, & Abuse, 23(4), 1270–1287. https://doi.org/10.1177/1524838019850623 Monahan, K. (2018). Intimate partner violence and traumatic brain injury: A public health issue. Journal of Neurology & Neuromedicine, 3(3), 3–6. https://doi.org/10.29245/2572.942x/2018/3.1181 By: Katherine Yajure Healing is not a straight road with clear signs and a final destination; it is a winding, unpredictable journey unique to each person. Some days feel like progress, while others feel like you’re back where you started. Whether healing from loss, mental anguish, illness, or personal struggles, this process is deeply personal. Some people find comfort in therapy, while others turn to spirituality, creative outlets, or community support. There is no single right way to heal, and understanding that can be a powerful act of self-compassion. Many wish healing were a simple step-by-step process with a clear finish line. But real healing is messy. According to Dr. Judith Herman, an emotional injury expert, healing often comes in phases: first, establishing safety, then processing the mental anguish, and finally, reconnecting with life (Herman, 1992). However, these phases don't happen in perfect order. Life triggers setbacks, old wounds resurface, and some days are harder than others. The concept of “two steps forward, one step back” is common in healing. Dr. Bessel van der Kolk, a leading psychiatrist in psychological injury research, explains that our bodies hold on to pain in ways we don’t always understand (Van der Kolk, 2014). This is why healing isn’t just about changing thoughts; it often requires engaging the body, whether through movement, breathwork, or other forms of physical healing. Because everyone's life experiences, support systems, and coping mechanisms are different, the healing journey will look different. What works for one person may not be effective for another. Some individuals find therapy and counseling, such as cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) and Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR), helpful in processing emotions and distress (Shapiro, 2018). Others turn to creative outlets like journaling, painting, or music to express what words cannot capture (Malchiodi, 2012). Yoga, meditation, and deep breathing help regulate emotions and calm the nervous system (Porges, 2011). For many, relationships and community are at the heart of healing. Dr. Bruce Perry's research shows how human connection can rewire the brain and foster emotional recovery (Perry & Szalavitz, 2017). The key is to find what feels right for you. Healing isn't about checking boxes; healing is about discovering what helps you move forward, even in the smallest ways. One of the hardest yet most important parts of healing is being gentle with yourself. Dr. Kristin Neff, an expert in self-compassion, reminds us that treating ourselves with kindness rather than harsh judgment helps build emotional resilience (Neff, 2011). It's okay to struggle. It's normal to feel stuck. Healing is not about being perfect; it's about showing up for yourself, even on hard days. Healing is deeply personal, unpredictable, and full of twists and turns. There’s no “right” way to do it; comparing your progress to someone else's won't help. What matters is taking steps, big or small, toward wholeness. Some days, progress may feel invisible. On other days, a small victory, such as getting out of bed, reaching out for support, or simply being kind to yourself, can mean everything. Healing is not linear. It’s a journey, and every step forward, no matter how small, is worth celebrating. References:
By: Abigail Guevara Recognizing Unhealthy and Abusive Relationships and Building Healthy One’s
It’s easy to recognize unhealthy relationships when viewing others' situations from a distance. For instance, seeing a man physically harm his partner is undeniably distressing. However, it becomes more complex when we consider the subtler forms of unhealthy relationships, such as the difficulties in friendships or the influence of growing up in homes where abusive behaviors felt normal. The Department of Health for Massachusetts outlines several red flags, including disrespect and dishonesty as early indicators of boundary violations. We may also find ourselves trapped in relationships marked by control, dependence, or hostility, which can isolate us and create feelings of entrapment. Furthermore, more blatant forms of abuse, such as stalking or intimidation, can severely impact an individual’s sense of safety and autonomy.
Society often teaches us about healthy relationships built on trust, love, care, humor, and safety, contrasting sharply with relationships characterized by violence and control. It’s important to acknowledge that our experiences shape us and the relationships we form. Educating young people about recognizing toxic patterns early on can be a vital step in cultivating healthier connections. Understanding what a healthy relationship looks like for you, and being willing to reflect on and address your behaviors, is crucial. We all have room to grow—not necessarily toward perfection, but toward healthier interactions. Recognizing and maintaining personal boundaries can be a powerful practice, though it can be challenging when those boundaries are unintentionally crossed. When discussing boundaries, consider how best to approach the conversation for yourself and the person involved. It’s essential to remember that setting and respecting your limits is a form of self-care, even if it may not resonate with everyone around you. Allowing yourself to let go of the need for control over others can alleviate stress and encourage peace of mind. Life is full of uncertainties—sometimes reality TV couples defy the odds and stay together, while first dates blossom into lasting marriages. Conversely, the reality is that childhood friendships may fade, and familial relationships can become strained, which can be incredibly painful. We often can’t predict how our stories will unfold, and it's perfectly fine to feel unsettled by that uncertainty. However, we can strive to remain mindful of our needs and definitions of healthy relationships, which can ultimately help protect our peace and well-being. Resources: https://www.mass.gov/info-details/what-does-an-unhealthy-relationship-look-like https://irep.ntu.ac.uk/id/eprint/29157/1/6631_Crowther-Dowey.pdf https://www.mentalhealth.org.uk/our-work/public-engagement/healthy-relationships/top-tips-building-and-maintaining-healthy-relationships By Cheyenne Taylor (from all of us at BOHCC)
Our Chief Executive Officer was honored recently by the Benedict Inn Sisters of St. Benedict. All of us at Beacon of Hope Crisis Center are so grateful for Sandy’s leadership and are very proud that she was nominated and selected to receive this deserved award. She received the Angels of Grace – Angel Michael Award! In her speech at the awards luncheon to the hundreds of attendees, Sandy spoke with the spirit of our agency, she educated the room, moved those listening from laughter to tears, and shared about our ongoing and amazing innovative work serving victims of crime.
“I am honored to receive this recognition. Thank you for this kindness. Thank you to all the Benedictine Sisters for the generous work that you do every day. The Angel Michael Award – Defender of the dignity and goodness of others! Wow – that IS what I do – but certainly not alone – I may lead this organization, but it is full of individuals with servants' hearts, and they too are defenders alongside me! This job is hard, and it is so amazing to be recognized for it! Saving lives and improving the quality of life for so many is why we do what we do every day and that is so truly rewarding!” – Sandy Ziebold |
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