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By: Cheyenne Taylor  Robert Ingersoll, an American lawyer and writer, once said, “We rise by lifting others.” Today, we want to discuss the ways we can help uplift survivors of sexual assault. We can start by changing the way society speaks about survivors. Common myths about sexual assault are harmful to survivors and can prevent them from getting the help and justice they deserve. These myths include beliefs that survivors “got what they deserved” or that they were “asking for it.” These thoughts are communicated through questions like, “What were they wearing,” “What were they doing,” or “Why did they drink so much?”
The truth is these types of questions focus on the wrong person. When a stabbing occurs, we never turn to the stabbing victim and question what they were wearing to make themselves more at risk of getting stabbed. We know that it is not our place to question survivors, and there is no justification for causing this harm. However, when speaking about sexual assault survivors, we assume they are lying – even though less than 2% of people are reported to have lied about sexual assault1. We also focus on questioning the survivors instead of questioning those who sexually assault people. Survivors are shamed so much that many do not report their perpetrators and many perpetrators go free. In fact, only 5 out of every 1,000 perpetrators will end up in prison2. Survivors feel so much shame for being sexually assaulted, but we can work together to take away those feelings of guilt. Instead of questioning survivors about their actions and what they did to “deserve” trauma that nobody deserves, we can show support to these survivors. We can offer support by using phrases like “It took a lot of courage to speak about this,” “It’s not your fault,” or “You are not alone. I am here to help.” We can also continue to check-in with them and give them the time to grieve and heal from their experiences. We should also validate their decisions. Listen to them without judgment and encourage them to make the best decision for themselves and their health. Additionally, we can suggest local resources to help the survivor. Beacon of Hope Crisis Center offers free services like protective order filing, safety planning, employment and financial assistance, emotional support, referrals for housing, jobs, and much more. Our victim advocates are here to support you. Speak with a victim advocate by calling our confidential crisis line at (317) 731-6140. If you are in immediate danger, please call 9-1-1. By: Cheyenne Taylor  The link between pet abuse and domestic violence is pervasive; in fact, pet abuse is one of four indicators of domestic violence within a household. We recognize that pets are the silent witnesses and secondary victims in violent homes. Animals are often threatened, abused, and killed in some cases.
Many survivors utilize our Foster Pet Program in order to guarantee the safety of their beloved pets. Survivors connect with our Director of Primary Prevention to complete an intake. Then, those who qualify will be paired with one of our Foster Pet Caregivers. If placement is available, our Director of Primary Prevention will arrange the details to safely deliver the pet(s) to the caregiver's home. They also stay in contact with the caregiver to give updates on the pet’s progress to the survivor. Our Foster Pet Caregivers are the heart of this program. If these wonderful people weren’t willing to open their homes and their hearts, survivors would have to stress over the safety of their pets or even give them away to protect them. In extreme cases, survivors might stay in a violent home to try to protect their pet(s) This program and our caregivers ensure that these survivors do not have to experience the additional trauma of pet loss. Thank you to everyone that has shown support to survivors at Beacon of Hope Crisis Center. How can you help?
By: Kristen Board  As we approach a year of being in the pandemic, many people are feeling exhausted and drained. Many people cling to the comfort of their precious pets when going through hard times. Others find it rewarding to reach out and help other people in times of despair. The Foster Pet Program at Beacon of Hope Crisis Center provides several opportunities for people to volunteer their time to help people and pets. The work of our agency and Foster Pet Program is more crucial than ever at this time because domestic violence and sexual assault have only increased within our community during the pandemic.
Many shelters in Indiana do not accept pets, so victims of domestic violence and sexual assault are left to decide whether to leave their beloved pet behind with their abuser or permanently rehome their pet while they find shelter. Statistics show that up to 40% of victims do not leave their abusive situations for fear of what will happen to their beloved pet. 71% of women in DV shelters have reported that their abuser has threatened, harmed, or killed their pet. Our program provides a temporary home to pet victims until the owner can secure safe housing and be reunited with their beloved pet. Our Foster Pet Program would not exist without the time and dedication of our volunteer foster caregivers, donors, and program volunteers. We are so grateful for everyone who has supported our program and helped us to save the lives of countless human and pet victims of domestic violence and sexual assault. We are actively recruiting for volunteer foster pet caregivers and other program volunteers for our Foster Pet Program. If you want to learn more about the Link between pet abuse and domestic violence, how our Foster Pet Program works, or the several ways to get involved by volunteering with our program, consider attending one of our virtual information sessions coming up in March. Register for one of our information sessions here: Tuesday, March 2nd 12pm-1pm Tuesday March 2nd 4pm-5pm  In January 2016, our current Chief Executive Officer / Executive Director (CEO/ED), Sandra Ziebold, accepted the role of CEO/ED at Beacon of Hope Crisis Center. In these last five years, she has guided us and encouraged us to grow as an agency as well as individuals. Today, we want to wish her a Happy Five Year’s at the agency. In her first year as CEO/ED, Sandy changed the agency name, making it more inclusive to all victims of domestic violence and sexual assault, no matter age, ethnicity, religious beliefs, or gender preference. She also relocated the agency to a more central location to better serve all victims within Central Indiana, including under served communities.
She has curated a team of exceptional leaders, victim advocates, contractors, interns, volunteers, and collaborative partnerships. Our agency has not only grown in size of employees and volunteers, but we have served more victims under her leadership. With her compassion, dedication, and leadership, we have been able to serve over 1200 victims annually over the past few years. She helped lead and worked with the team in serving 1271 victims in 2020 despite an ongoing pandemic. In addition to increasing the number of victims served, we have been able to form strong collaborative partnerships with numerous local law enforcement agencies, local hospitals, veterinary agencies, rescue shelters, community centers, other domestic violence and sexual assault agencies/shelters, etc., while under her leadership. Reaching victims and ensuring that they are being served, has not only been a priority, but so has ensuring that all victims including pet victims are receiving adequate and timely services at BOHCC. In 2017, she played a critical role in presenting to the Indiana State Senate and advocating for pets to be eligible to be added as protected parties on protective orders. That was approved by the Indiana State Senate and victims can now add their pet/s as protective parties on their protective orders. In 2018, she expanded accessibility by ensuring that we can serve anyone despite if they are non-English speaking, deaf or have any other accessibility needs. In 2019, she served as an Expert Witness for the State in a Sentencing Hearing and the result was the defendant receiving the maximum sentence for Domestic Violence Animal Cruelty a Level 6 Felony. In 2020, she served as an Expert Witness for the State in an Attempted Murder Trial and the jury found the defendant guilty of domestic battery, strangulation, intimidation, and disorderly conduct. We recognize that the success of this agency is amplified thanks to her dedication, compassion, understanding, commitment, impressive business decisions and advice. Even with the unexpected pandemic, Sandy has prioritized the health of the employees and the clients we serve. She has always done thorough research and made decisions with careful deliberation to ensure that everyone is cared for in the best way possible. We, as an agency, are so grateful for Sandy and her continued support and advocacy for victims as well as all of us at BOHCC. Thank you, Sandy for an incredible five years leading the BOHCC team. We look forward to having many more with you! Happy Work Anniversary! By Sandra K. Ziebold  “Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter.” – Martin Luther King, Jr. End of Year Giving or Year-End Giving, whichever phrasing you prefer, we need you! Please Will You Help Us Finish 2020 Strong? Seven reasons giving to charity is so rewarding and good for you!
If these seven reasons, to consider A Year End Gift to support our work here at Beacon of Hope Crisis Center, are not enough here are two more:
 By: Cheyenne Taylor  Featured in photo: James R. Speiser, CCRT, DABVP, DVM, RSO IndyVet Emergency & Specialty Hospital and Savannah Tipton, Advocacy Manager Beacon of Hope Crisis Center We want to take this opportunity to give a huge thank you to IndyVet Emergency & Specialty Hospital for their generous donation. IndyVet is an essential 24hr emergency veterinary hospital working around the clock to provide relief and help to Indianapolis pets. They remain a dedicated partner with Beacon of Hope Crisis Center, and once again, they have taken philanthropic action to better our community and have donated $5,000 to our agency. We are so grateful for their on-going support and partnership with our Foster Pet Program. Pets are victims of domestic violence too and partnerships like this help us save the lives of pets, individuals, and families. When incidents of domestic abuse and pet abuse are located on maps and then you overlay those maps the link between domestic violence and pet abuse is undeniable. This donation will have a massive impact on the lives of those seeking our services. Organizations like IndyVet Emergency & Specialty Hospital exemplify the strength and selflessness that is prominent in Indianapolis, and we deeply appreciate them for helping us and Indianapolis survivors once again. “I cannot state emphatically enough how much the supportive partnership with Dr. Speiser, his partners and his entire IndyVet team are valued and appreciated for all that they do. Take a moment if you are not familiar and visit their website and location. Consider signing up with us to temporarily foster a pet while their family member(s) heal and safely get resettled then that pet victim can be reunited with their family.” – Sandra K. Ziebold, CEO Beacon of Hope Crisis Center We are so proud to have partners with giving hearts like IndyVet Emergency & Specialty Hospital. They are paving the way to change by showing up to help pet victims, and we want to encourage everyone to follow their lead as they set this incredible example for our community. Thank you again, IndyVet Emergency & Specialty Hospital, for your donation and all your hard work!
By: Cheyenne Taylor  This year has been a difficult and trying year for many due to the impact of the pandemic, especially victims of domestic violence. While the world has been focusing on the pandemic, domestic violence has only escalated behind closed doors. It has not taken a break despite this pandemic. For victims, the pandemic has only created additional barriers in accessing services. We want to take this time to emphasize that we are here for all victims facing domestic violence victimization. We serve all.
We offer services that are accessible even during this pandemic. We have language services to help with translation needs. If you identify as a part of the LGBTQIA+, we serve you, and we have referrals as well. If you are atheistic or follow another religion, we are still here for you and respect your religious practices. We will not refuse to serve anyone because of race, gender identity, or other identifiers. We believe that everyone deserves to live free from the grip of domestic violence. Here are a few ways you can seek our help. First, you can call us directly at 317-731-6140 to speak confidentially with a victim advocate. Our advocates are on the lines from 8:30 am to 1 am. If we cannot pick up, please leave a detailed voicemail with your name, a return safe contact number or email, times to return your call and we will reach back out as soon as possible. Second, you can contact us through social media DMs. Facebook will get the quickest response, but you can reach us at any site easily accessible to you. Lastly, you can email us at info@beaconofhopeindy.org and we will get back in touch with you as soon as we can. Make sure to visit our website at BeaconOfHopeIndy.Org to learn about all our free services and resources that we offer. We are here to help you! By: Cheyenne Taylor  Domestic violence can take away your strength, your independence, and your feelings of safety. Even after the abusive individual is out of your life, you might find yourself facing conflicting emotions that can harm your mental health. Survivors of trauma are three times more likely to become depressed and often face challenges with anxiety, panic attacks, triggers, etc.
The truth is leaving an abusive relationship does not automatically equate to happiness and health. There is as an adjustment period. Survivors have to learn how to navigate life without the abuse. They have to unlearn behaviors and become comfortable making all their own choices. They also have to come to terms with the fact that the relationship is over. Survivors often feel sadness or grief over the loss of the relationship and those are normal emotions to feel. Whether it be the companionship, the security of a romantic connection, or a simple bond built from trauma, ending an abusive relationship is not as cut and dry as many believe. Healing from past hurts can seem impossible, but many survivors have been there and come out on the other side happier and healthier. It is important that victims know they are not alone. Healing starts from within. Taking care of yourself, prioritizing your happiness and health, and learning to use your voice after being silenced by violence are all crucial steps in the healing process. We are here to help ALL survivors through the steps in any way possible. Leaving is the most challenging part. The rest is healing and becoming the healthier new you. There will be setbacks, and there will be triumphs. We are here to help you through your healing process or to start your healing process. Call our victim advocates at 317-731-6140 to discuss our services that can help you on your journey. These calls are confidential, and all our services are free. By: Cheyenne Taylor
Domestic Violence Awareness Month is observed each October to unite advocates across the U.S. and acknowledge the efforts to end domestic violence. Across the country, advocates and survivors fight endlessly to raise awareness to the public about domestic violence. This month, we are doing our part to raise awareness while discussing the link between domestic violence and pet abuse.
Pet abuse is one of the four major indicators of domestic violence within a household. Abusers may kill, harm, or threaten victims' pets to force victims to comply with their wishes. In fact, 71% of female domestic violence survivors have reported that their abusers have done so1. Animal abuse often causes victims to stay longer in an abusive situation for fear of what will happen to their pets if they leave. 25-40% of abused women have reported staying with their abusers longer to ensure their pets’ safety1. No one should ever be put in a situation where they have to sacrifice their safety to ensure their pet remains unharmed. At Beacon of Hope Crisis Center, we recognize pets are silent victims that often go unserved. Pet abuse coincides with other types of human abuse, including domestic violence, elder abuse, and child abuse. In the case of child abuse, there is a lot of research that shows child victims abusing pets, either at the demand of the abuser or because of broader issues that could lead to the child becoming a batterer or violent adult. Because of the immense connection between pet abuse and other forms of abuse, first responders no longer view pet abuse as an isolated incident. It often alerts first responders to issues within a household. Many first responders rely on the following red flags for identifying pet abuse. If the pet has open wounds, scars, extreme thinness, an inability to walk or stand normally, or inadequate grooming, this might be a sign of mistreatment. If the pet displays behaviors such as hyper aggression, being timid, trembling when the abuser is near, or protectiveness of the victim or children, these are also all red flags that should alert people of possible pet abuse. It is also a red flag if a pet’s environment is inadequate, too small, or unclean. What can you do to help both victims and pets of victims from violence? You can stay informed about the link between domestic violence and pet abuse and donate to causes like ours to continue to raise awareness and fight against domestic violence and pet abuse. You can also become a foster parent for our Foster Pet Program and open your home to temporarily rehouse victims' pets until victims can find safe housing and reunite with their beloved animals. You can also share our message with your friends and loved ones to encourage them to become foster parents with our organization and help both the pets and their humans find safety and happiness. Click to learn more about our Foster Pet Program. By: Cheyenne Taylor  Toxic positivity is often portrayed as positive thinking, but it is often dismissive of negative emotions. All emotions are natural and should be felt. If you spend all your time denying your negative emotions, you never give yourself time to work through issues. Below are some examples of toxic positivity to help you identify some unhealthy phrases you may have heard or used:
“Don’t focus on the bad; just focus on the good!” The issue with just focusing on the good and ignoring the bad in any instance is that you do not learn or grow by focusing on your accomplishments. Concentrating on and appreciating your successes is excellent for building your confidence. Still, you grow as a person when you address your failures and figure out what went wrong and what to do in the future. Also, keep in mind that disappointment is something we all feel; it is okay to focus on the bad and allow yourself to process those feelings. “It could be worse,” or “Look on the bright side.” Often, people use this to make others feel better, but it can invalidate a person’s emotions and make them feel like they do not have the right to be upset about their experiences. While you could argue most situations could be made worse, it does not change the fact that a situation is terrible. Also, while looking at the silver lining might be okay in some cases, it is not always possible. In terms of sexual assault, many victims have been told well they’re lucky because they survived; however, they still experienced sexual assault, which is horrible, and stating that they are fortunate undermines the pain they’ve experienced. Overall, if someone is telling you about a bad experience they had, it is so much better to acknowledge the difficulty they’ve faced than to tell them it could have been worse. Lastly, “Don’t give up,” or “Failure is not an option.” These both preserve the idea that failure is bad and giving up is wrong, when the truth is both are just options that have a bad rep. Giving up is not a bad thing, and there are times where you need to. One, failure is just a part of life; there’s no point in making people feel bad about something we have all experienced and will probably experience again. Second, pushing yourself to succeed and ignoring signs of a situation or opportunity not being a good fit for you is not helpful. In a lot of cases, people have revealed they felt a weight off their shoulders when they left a stressful situation/relationship/opportunity. This is not to encourage you to give up when you have a stressful day at a job or in a healthy relationship, but rather to denote the idea that by giving up, you have failed, when sometimes by toughing out a situation you have failed to acknowledge your unhappiness. There are many more examples of toxic positivity to look out for, but it is most important to make sure you are allowing yourself the time to process and feel your emotions. You cannot heal and move on if you ignore the darker parts of life. Learning from these experiences and growing is a process, but the process doesn’t start until you accept your feelings. If you or someone you know has experienced sexual assault or domestic violence, please call our confidential crisis line at 317-731-6140 to speak with a victim advocate. If you are in immediate danger please call 9-1-1. |
About this blog
This blog is about our domestic and sexual violence crisis center, Beacon of Hope. We hope you find it full of helpful information, motivation, creativity, serious facts and positivity. We hope that it will help you know what is happening in our center, in our community and with our events. We hope you follow our blog in support of our organization and our mission. Archives
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